Sometimes I wonder if there is any
meaning to anything. I wonder if faith is real or just some cruel
ruse played on small minds. I wonder if I'm where I'm supposed to be.
I wonder if my dreams are my own. I wonder if sanity exists. I wonder
if I am of worth. More than anything I wonder if any of it's real...
God, life, purpose.
Sometimes the only step I can take is
the one directly in front of me. The only way forward is to deal with
the past. The only way to really dream is to let go of the
expectations. And the only way to live is to hope that one day there
will be a clear horizon beyond the doubt of today.
"Some
periods of our growth are so confusing that we don’t even recognize
that growth is happening. We may feel hostile or angry or weepy and
hysterical, or we may feel depressed. It would never occur to us,
unless we stumbled on a book or a person who explained to us, that we
are in fact in the process of change... Whenever we grow, we tend to
feel it, as a young seed must feel the weight and inertia of the
earth as it seeks to break out of its shell on its way to becoming a
plant. Often the feeling is anything but pleasant. But what is most
unpleasant is the not knowing what is happening...”. Alice
Walker
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